Wednesday, July 20, 2011


It is said that to error is human and to forgive is divine.  Perhaps this is why it is so easy to make mistakes but so hard to forgive them.  Any relationship, whether it be within the parameters of friendship or love will have its moments of both error and forgiveness.  The key is not to dwell on either; the problem is that human nature will always cause us to obsess on both.  So I put forth a question: how do we survive our relationships when it is a most certain fate that we will undoubtedly error and unfortunately, be unable to forgive?

The answer can be found in a process already in place, but ironically, for protection of a rather unusual sort.  It would seem that in order to be able to forgive, it takes time, distance and a bit of shielding.  Time is obvious for who among us has not had to let time heal all while we’ve pondered the injustice done to us.  It is the ultimate “fixer” and while we may never truly forget, it certainly allows for the pain to ultimately dissipate and become no more.  Time’s cousin comes in the form of distance.  It is often the miles between you allowing for true and honest reflection that brings forth forgiveness.  Distance can often be time well spent in the art of absolution.  Finally, and possibly most surprising, is shielding. Although it is true that an open heart will often find happiness in its relationships, it is also a somewhat guarded one that will perhaps think twice before blindly leaping.  It is this shielded cautious spirit that might allow for introspection and thorough intellectual evaluation before making the error or preparing to forgive.

The paradox then is not in that there may be a tried and true way to survive the inevitable cycle of error and forgiveness, but instead in the fact that the process by which to do so is actually how one attempts to protect oneself from being exposed to something much more serious and deadly.  Time, distance and shielding might aid one in the process of forgiveness but actually, it is the process by which to protect oneself against the harmful effects of radiation.

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